so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
Randomize
