Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Randomize
