I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize