I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Randomize
