My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
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