dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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