A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
my liver is dry heaving
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Randomize
