I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
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