I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
