I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Randomize
