Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
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