So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Randomize
