My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
