Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
Hello my rib-scented angel!
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
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