is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
Randomize
