a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
Randomize