I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize
