do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
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