porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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