i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
Randomize
