marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
our cab driver is having phone sex.
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
this boner is exhausting
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
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