The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Randomize
