Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
you mean i was at the winter classic?
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
