I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
You know you suck at relationships when you are sitting in the airport on Christmas day, alone, swiping on Tinder.
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
Randomize
