"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
Randomize
