kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
how drunk are you?
Several
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
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