Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
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