2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
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