The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Randomize
