sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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