Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize