What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
I just gargled with NyQuil
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize