We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
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