Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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