do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
Randomize
