"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
