Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
Randomize