So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Randomize
