Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Randomize
