He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
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