Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Randomize
