I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
He left a cum stain in the shape of a heart on my sheets.
He's like the Bob Ross of love stains.
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
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