Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
Randomize
