is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
Randomize
