ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
