Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
Randomize