You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Randomize
