Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize