Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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