Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
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